Facebook Is Like Speed Dating

Facebook is kind of like speed dating. If I went to a speed dating event, I would only be allowed to spend three to five minutes with each guy. They would tell me everything that they wanted me to know and leave out everything that they don’t want me to know. They might even lie to make me like them more. In the end I will find out very little about who they really are. Facebook is similar in the sense that you won’t learn everything about a person simply by visiting their Facebook page.

Just like with speed dating I choose what others can know and not know from my Facebook. I know that people’s opinions of me often come from what they find on Facebook. The things that you won’t find on my Facebook aren’t on there because I don’t want them on there and the things that you do find I chose to be there so that it would influence your opinion of me. From my profile picture to the things that I post, I use them all to create my digital identity.  Because I choose not to expose everything about myself on Facebook, it cannot be a true representation of myself.

If someone was to visit my Facebook, they would only find out what I want people to know about me. They would learn what movies I like, the TV shows I watch, and what kind of music I listen to. They would find out who I’m dating, when my birthday is, and where I work. It may not be a conscious decision to choose these things as the things that people will judge me by but people do base their opinions of me on the things they find on my Facebook.

This weekend I found out that my brother, Jake, now has a girlfriend which is a big deal for my brother because he has never really seemed interested in dating before. Her name is Chelsea Schack and instinctively, I wanted to know what she was like so I went straight to Facebook. Since I wasn’t her Facebook friend, it made it more difficult but I did find out some things about her. Searching through her pictures, all I really found out was what she looks like, where she goes to school, and that she runs track and does golf. These things hardly give me a sense of what she is like. The only way to truly get to know Chelsea is to talk to her and spend time with her. Just like the only way to decide if like someone enough to date them is not from a five minute talk with some strange guy I have never met, but from spending time with him and getting to know one another.

I believe that we should not use Facebook to judge others. What I find on Facebook should not completely define a person. My Facebook only gives bits and pieces of my personality so rather than only knowing those pieces, why not get to know the rest of my personality by talking to me or spending time with me.